Dancing the Twists and Turns of Trauma

Dancing with all of the twists and turns of trauma in our lives takes us places we never dreamed of. Some of them turn into adventures that bring us great delight and healing. Others take a dark turn that we need to endure to see the other side. As we learn to dance through the…Read more »

Days I Do Not Want to Feel the Pain

Not interested in feeling the pain of life every day. It hurts too much. It hurts so much that I simply do not feel the pain of it all today. Not the pain of disease or the chronic suffering from it. Not the pain of the decades of trauma and the consequences from others. Not…Read more »

Fear of Being Healthy

There are all kinds of reasons to be fearful of being healthy. As odd as it sounds, there really are. Once we recognize those fears that create barriers, we can move toward health more smoothly. Bridging the transition can be beautiful and yet there can be fear. Check out these legitimate reasons to be fearful…Read more »

Finding a Man Worthy of our Disease

It takes a man of great character to be worthy of a relationship with someone who has chronic illness, pain and trauma. Yes, I said that sentence correctly. There are many chronically ill people who desire healthy relationships through the journey of unhealthy bodies. Instead of looking at it like, “who would ever choose me,”…Read more »

Cognitive Disruptions – Let’s Clarify Crazy

There is crazy and there are cognitive disruptions. Fruit-loopy, nuts, crazy, mad, ditz, blonde, air-head, slow, the short bus – – you get the idea. Chronic pain makes us all a bit loony. Others join in name-calling and we even do it to ourselves, calling ourselves stupid or idiots when we miss a beat. Maybe…Read more »

Calvary to the Rescue

Guns a blazing, here they come!! This weekend it felt like the Calvary came to my rescue. “I need help” seems like the most basic statement but it gets complicated and messy when we are chronically ill for years. It gets more complicated when we do not physically look like we are ill. So when…Read more »

Wipe Out

Even “wipe-out” days are not as bad as they used to be. Had another wipe-out day today. Yesterday was a long difficult day getting to the doctor for help with my struggling heart. It took everything in me to get there but it was necessary. It was also worth spending the next day in bed…Read more »

Days I can’t begin to see the whole picture

Had no clue that being chronically ill could be so difficult. Had no clue that a person with trauma in their past could be so affected by it while walking through chronic illness. Had no clue this could be the most difficult journey of my life and last for so many years. There are days…Read more »

Frame Your Trauma

There are times when I literally have to “frame” an episode of something that feels traumatic to be able to see through it. Giving it some kind of temporary placeholder so I can step back and see it differently, more thoroughly. Maybe it is a type of barrier so I can define what is truly…Read more »

Just when you want to say, “What the heck?”

Walking down these paths of chronic illness, pain and trauma can bring many “What the heck” moments. Things don’t line up, they don’t make sense, they don’t appear as we think we should see them. It is so easy to look at this photo and say there is no possible way that this is real.…Read more »