Trust can be a scary word for those with chronic illness, pain and trauma in their lives. There are many hurts along the way that have justified our feelings. It is when those feelings no longer serve us, that we can find trust again. Trusting ourselves can be a factor in the process.
Everything can get turned upside down when we experience a long-term illness, especially with past or present trauma complicating it all. It can make us question everyone and their intentions and it certainly can make us question ourselves.
When is it time to examine trust again? This is so personal that there is no black and white answer. There is a time not to trust to keep us safe either from an abuser, whether it is a personal relationship or it is a medical/health relationship. We have to learn to keep ourselves safe and trust our instincts to do so.
It is trusting in ourselves and our instincts that I want to address here. Have you ever gotten into a quiet space and realized that you are listening more to the media, society or even well-intended friends and family than yourself? There will always be times for listening to others, same as there are times when we need to trust we have answers within ourselves.
Do you believe you have the ability to think for yourself and come to your own conclusions? Some days I would answer that yes and other days I would answer no.
I need others:
Sometimes I need the advice of others who have walked before me so that I can see their wisdom.
At times I do not have the book knowledge required to make a sound decision and have to rely on others who are more educated on a particular subject.
And there are times when family and friends know me well enough to see my blind spots.
I need to trust that I have the best answer within myself:
These are the times when the world appears to be spinning out of control with everyone else’s opinions that do not fit my needs at all. Others opinions are just turning confusion into madness.
When it feels like others are digging my hole even deeper than I have dug it myself, I stop and examine why I don’t trust myself to know what would be best for me.
To explore this, I sit still and see if I find peace in the stillness or not. When I find peace in that still quiet place, I start to find the answers inside myself. With those answers come more trust in myself. With some momentum of trusting myself, it starts to become more natural.
When we do not hush the chaos of others, we tend to turn around and insert unintended chaos into others lives. It has to stop somewhere and we have the ability to trust our instincts and hush that chaos.
There are times when it is okay to smile at the fact that you have this one!!
There are times that life can get so complicated that no other human can possibly understand and it becomes pointless trying to explain. That is when I know that I can trust something deep inside myself to carry me through with understanding, compassion, kindness and a joy that no other can provide.
When do you know that it is right to trust yourself?
Maribeth Baxter, MBEC (Certified Mind-Body Eating Coach)
Donations are accepted to serve others on their chronic illness journey. Maribeth Baxter, MBEC provides voluntary certified health coaching services to the financially limited during their time of crisis.